In Tao Tantric theory is it said that in sexual energy exchange, the yin and yang essence of man and woman exchanges. What does that look like?
Well, Yin is softness, receptivity and yielding whereas yang is hardness, giving and penetrating. Most young women have a more prominent yin essence, most young men have a more prominent yang essence. This is only a “most” because there are exceptions to every rule. This however, is not about the exceptions but the majority, with full respect to all the exceptions out there! (If you find yourself in a different situation, you can still take the principles and see how they may have danced through your life in their own unique way.)
So a young woman is at her most yin. At best this means she is soft, gentle and vulnerable…the archetypical maiden. However, at it’s most challenged she may be weak, naïve and even carry the energy of a victim. How the yin develops all depends upon the surroundings in which she was raised…most notably the space that was held for vulnerability in her home environment. If a safe loving space was there, her yin will be open and soft. If it was lacking, she is more likely to develop victim behavior.
And what about the young man? How is his yang essence displayed? The young man carries the energy of creating boundaries and fighting for what he believes in…the archetypical warrior. Not a soldier fighting for someone else’s beliefs, but a warrior with a cause, who defends what he loves, protecting the Motherland. In modern days of course there aren’t so many warriors walking around and a young man’s yang is more likely displayed in energy towards creating his purpose in life through work and business than through fighting for a cause.
The unhealthy young man may express his yang as being a bit of a thug. A man who has no beliefs to stand up for may fight for nothing. He may join gangs or so on and fight for tribes who have not given him love and nourishment, for lack of having that tribe. So unhealthy yang is expressed in young men through violence. Again this is dependent upon the environment in which he was raised, and whether it was loving or not.
Now, the law of attraction states that opposites attract; whether that is in a magnet, electricity or human beings. So the young yin female is drawn to the young yang male. And of course our sweet gentle maiden is attracted to our noble warrior. Note also that our powerless victim girl is drawn to our violent thug…a sorry tale indeed.
Now what happens when we relate and make love? Tao Tantra theory says that in orgasm the yin and yang energies exchange. Thus the woman’s inner yang is awakened and a man’s inner yin.
So we can actually see that a sexually active, relating woman may gradually become more yang…not a male kind of yang but the feminine yang, the feminine fire develops in her. The gentle maiden in her teens/20s becomes the fiery wild woman in her 20s/30s. Her sexuality goes from a soft yielding expression to becoming wildly orgasmic. As she matures she may either channel this energy into motherhood, or she may become more of a healer or a nurturer to the masses (still the mother energy but in a another form). This energy then distills into her wisdom as she becomes the wise woman in later life.
And what of our young man with all his fiery yang? Well if he is exchanging energy we can see him become progressively more soft. Again, he does not feminize as such, but he develops the masculine yin. Our fiery young warrior/start-up-biz-genius softens into a caring lover as he continues to make love with the feminine. He looks to women less as conquests and more as lovers. His heart opens.
From lover he may develop into the King energy…the man who stands nobly at the side of his woman; the man who rules over his kingdom/ business with justice and wisdom. The mature masculine is decidedly more yin that his younger counterpart…less of the running about trying to achieve everything, and more of standing bearing witness over it all, giving good guidance when required.
And entering the later years he also distills the energy into wisdom. For in man or women, this balancing of inner yin and yang generates wisdom. Wise woman/ wise man…these archetypes are the closest to each other. Whereas warrior and maiden are opposites, wise man and woman are close. The sex drive may have chilled out by this stage as the polarity lessens, but the mutual understanding has grown!
And what of our victim and thug? Well, either they choose a path of personal evolution and lift themselves out of the rut they are in. Or they grow together in their unhealthy state. The victim woman hardens into a yang of anger and resentment. The thug man softens into a yin of purposelessness and often alcoholism or drug addiction. These are unhealthy forms of feminine yang (hardness) and masculine yin (purposelessness).
So we can see, yin and yang are not fixed states. Not all women are destined to stay “yin” forevermore, nor all men stuck as purely “yang”. As we are drawn into union together, as we fall in love with our opposite and unite through our lovemaking, we actually move through transformation. We actually give a gift to our lover: awakening the latent energies within them and helping them to become gradually more balanced and more whole. This is a life long journey, a dance in the realm of apparent opposites as we waltz back towards the unity from whence we came.
© 2014. Shashi Solluna. All rights reserved.