Remember a time in your life when you reached a moment that was like a doorway that said “Fear” on it? A moment where you became shaky and energy started to bubble in the depths of your belly….
What did you do?
Did you take a deep breath and enter? Or did you start fixing big bolts to the door? And after fixing many bolts and locks, you pushed furniture against it. In fact you built blockades in any way you could, in order to feel safe and protected. You even involved other people, making sure they agreed never to push you through that door, nor open it themselves. You bound them into contracts and agreements to protect yourself from the possibility of entering that door.
Because we have all been taught to fear fear.
Trouble is, now you feel trapped. You carry a deep nagging sense that there is more to life somehow, that you are not fully alive, not fully living. From time to time you get angry and frustrated by all the blockades, even though you put them there yourself. You get angry with the people you bound into contracts with you, as even now you are still not happy, stuck in a load of agreements that keep you small.
So you are stuck, in your own self-made prison.
And the reason for all of it stems back to how you responded the moment you came to that doorway of fear.
But it is never too late to make another choice. The Universe is always waiting to offer you your highest potential.
Let’s go back to that door again. Pull some of the furniture out of the way: all of those certainties and beliefs you have built founded on a conviction that doorway was bad. Are you willing to change your perspective? Good, then the furniture can be moved. Say to yourself “I am willing to see things differently”, and the clearing will begin.
Now you need to let go of any contracts you created to protect that fear. Release those people you have asked to limit or adjust their behavior in order to protect your fear. Say to them “I’m sorry I made a mistake. I set you free”. Or if you are no longer with them in life, you can say to the Universe: “I now release all contracts that bind myself and others to fear-based reality”. Free up some of those bolts. Throw off some of the padlocks.
If you find yourself attached to the protection, unable to release your grasp frozen in fear of what might happen if you relinquish control, call in Divine Assistance. There is a higher vibrational beneficent force in the universe that acts towards your highest evolution. Ask Him/Her/It to help you. Even if you don’t believe it, assistance is there. You have nothing to lose (apart from your own self-made prison walls), so why not ask?
Now you get to the door. There it looms, butterflies in your belly as you look at it. Why not cross out the word “Fear” and replace it with the word “Potential…”
Don’t forget the three dots, because after all, this is a gateway to the Mystery, the Unknown. You are drawn to it, but as you get close you are afraid.
We are so often afraid as we near an opportunity to expand into our potential. Think of a time you were afraid of giving a public speech or performing on a stage. Or maybe before taking a leap, rock climbing, surfing, or taking a leap in life: new job, leaving a stagnant relationship, going travelling. It is worth noting that before any life expansion there comes a moment of fear. The gateway of fear appears to be there, but actually it is a gateway of potential.
So stop a moment before you open. Stop and let yourself dissolve. Maybe you want to shake your body or whirl into union with Existence. Or perhaps meditate until there is nothing left. Maybe you want to fall on your knees and pray to transform fear into faith. Or you could dance until you are naked, wild and free. You could sing your heart out until you have expanded your heart as vast as the skies.
One way or another, expand you being to the point of ecstasy where joy and pain are indistinguishable. To the point where good and bad become meaningless, and only IS is. At that point of expansion you are ready to open the door. Find your inner yes and then open the door. Feel your heart expanded with love and then open it. You are ready to handle to vastness of light that is your true nature.
And what was thought of as fear was actually a great potential, offering itself to you. What was thought of as fear was actually energy awakening. What was thought of as fear was actually a death so sweet that you would be reborn into your true blissful self and never look back once to see the prison you left, nor at the pile of clothes at the door: your old identity so small your soul never had a chance of shining within it.
So next time you reach the threshold of the gateway of fear…take a breath before you start applying bolts, and see if you can find a new way to meet fear.
© 2014. Shashi Solluna. All rights reserved.